Mudita Journal

Love Archive

No, your child is not your friend

May 31, 2015  ·  Category: Feelings, Love, Parenting

Update: I've been reflecting with a friend about how this post feels more stern than I'd like. Let's say I have personal experience, though not yet as a parent. I'm tempted to edit the piece to adjust its tone. But perhaps it would be better to just acknowledge where I was coming from, when I wrote it. I was feeling strongly. * * * Reflections on the parent-child relationship, so commonly relevant for single parents, where the line between "friend" and "parent" can be more tempting to blur: What exactly is that line? Part of the parent role is this: My child is ...

You had sex. Now she’s hurt.

May 30, 2015  ·  Category: Authenticity, Feelings, Love

On my mind this morning is a scenario many of my male friends will recognize. You meet a woman. She’s in a vulnerable space. Maybe you are too, or less so, or less consciously so. You feel protective of her, of her hurt, and perhaps toward the men she’s had difficulties with. And there’s chemistry. Maybe you put it off at first; you know she’s vulnerable. But before long, you become involved sexually. But it’s not really working out. Soon you pull away. You’re both a little disoriented. And she’s hurt. They say there are sheep, there are wolves, and there are sheep-dogs. ...

“What are you feeling, right now?”

March 20, 2015  ·  Category: Authenticity, Circling, Feelings, Love

Often lately I think the most two people have to give one another, in loving connection, is the truth of their feelings in a moment. “I feel nervous and energized. This post comes from a deep place inside, but I don’t know how well it will be received. Feels like I’m taking a chance.” In a way, the meaning of life is the feeling of life. By sharing what we feel, we grow meaning together. We can share not just feelings about one another, but feeling as such — how it feels to be fresh home from an errand, to finish a phone ...